School Conferences: Disciplining Your Child in the Presence of Others by Mrs. Dorothy Barron

School Conferences: Disciplining Your Child in the Presence of Others by Mrs. Dorothy Barron

Has your presence been requested by your child’s school for a conference due to your child‘s adverse behavior or action(s)?

You may or may not have foreknowledge of the reason (s) for the school conference; however, in Parents Taking Charge in Education Parental Guidebook Series 1, “How to Hold a School Conference,” one recommendation is that you request prior to the school conference the purpose and issue(s) to be discussed during the conference if not forthcoming from the school prior to the conference. Such affords you the opportunity to prepare, gather information and/or in this case, get your child’s perspective of the situation and have your child explain his/her behavior and/or action(s).

Parents, I would not presume to tell you when or how to discipline your child, but I would like to ask you to consider your actions during a school conference and the disciplining of your child due to adverse behavior or actions in the presence of others during a school conference.

Suppose you attend the school conference and learn that your child is at fault and the child’s behavior and/or action(s) totally unacceptable. As a Parent, you are displeased, embarrassed and/or angry at the child. You may even view your child’s action as a reflection of you as a Parent and/or your parenting skills. Parents, what you do at this point is crucial to all involved and parties present.

Ÿ  Be careful how you speak to your child- speak in a caring and calm voice.

Ÿ  Make sure your child knows and understands that his/her behavior and/or actions were inappropriate or incorrect.

Ÿ  Be careful of your actions. You have good intentions and may even feel it important that others in the conference realize you do not condone your child’s behavior or actions and are serious about correcting the problem, behavior and/or action. If you feel it necessary to discipline at this point, halt the conference briefly and remove you and your child to a more private place.

Ÿ  Do not use the situation as “tit for tat” or a means of retaliation; the child’s behavior or action(s) have embarrassed you and now, you choose to publicly embarrass the child. Consider disciplining the child later at home. Such gives both you and the child time to think about the situation and you, time to consider the best action(s) to take in rectifying the situation and/or dealing with your child.

Ÿ  If amends and/or restitution to others are necessary, do so and ensure that your child issues a sincere apology. Many Parents also issue an apology on both the child and Parent’s behalf.

I suggest you consider the above, because and from experience I have found that:

Ÿ  Educators often treat your child/ren the way you do.

Ÿ  The manner in which you handle your child and the situation speak volumes of you as a Parent, as well as your parenting skills.

Ÿ  Most children will disappoint Parents at some point and time. In this case, how you, the Parent handle the school conference publicly with your child can build or break a bond of trust and communication between you and your child. Should you allow the bond to be broken, others will use it to their advantage and you and your child’s disadvantage.

For more tips, see, by Author, Mrs. Dorothy Barron’s, Parents Taking Charge in Education Parental Mini-Guide Booklet, How to Hold a School Conference? Parents, do you also have your PTCnEd Parent- School Conference Tracker Mimi-Guide? It can assist you with keeping track of the conference and keeping the conference on track.

                                            PTCnED Parent-School Conference Tracker
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

For information on how to get yours, go here: http://www.dorothybarron.com/slingingstones/2011/02/mrs-dorothy-barron-parents-taking-charge-in-education-announces-parents-taking-charge-in-education-s.html or send an e-mail to: jarrod@jarrodspublishing.com

 

Mrs. Dorothy Barron, Founder

Parents Taking Charge in Education (PTCnEd) http://mrsdbarron.blogspot.com

E-mail: barron.dorothy@yahoo.com

Parent-School Conferences by Mrs. Dorothy Barron

Parent-School Conferences by Mrs. Dorothy Barron

At some point each school year, you will be invited or your presence requested at a school conference for your child or children. Do you prepare for your child’s conference(s)? Perhaps, your response is don’t I just show up? You can, but being prepared, confident and in charge assists with eliminating anxiety and frustration (excerpt from Parents Taking Charge in Education Series: How to Hold a School Conference? Written by Mrs. Dorothy Barron). 

On today, Let us discuss Parent-School Conferences; there are primarily three types:

Ø  General School Conferences- invitation for all parents to meet faculty and teachers and obtain important information about the school and your child/ren’s curriculum. Many schools offer primarily two conferences per year- one at the beginning of the school year and during the second half of the school year during Spring.

Ø  School Initiated Conference- the school (teacher, administrators and/or others) requests your presence at a meeting

Ø  Parent Initiated Conference- the Parent requests a meeting with the school.

Parent-School Conferences for some parents cause some trepidation; such to an extent is normal. Some Parents however exemplify nervousness, dread, anxiety and even anger when having to attend their child’s Parent-School Conference(s). The range of emotions may be due the following:

Ø  Some Parents have not been inside a school since graduation.

Ø  Child’s negative actions/behavior reflects the Parents’ and/or their parenting skills.    

Ø  Parent’s own personal school experience(s) as a student and the school/principal reminds the parent of his/her own past school experiences, infraction, problems, etc.

Ø  Inferiority Complex- lack of education, language barriers, socio-economic challenges

Ø  Foreign/Hostile Territory- Some parents do not feel they are part of the decision making process or have any rights when it comes to their children’s education and/or schools.

Ø  Some Parents lack understanding and knowledge of the education process and do not feel confident enough to make informed decisions about their child/ren’s education.

Ø  Interruption to Parents’ busy schedule or activities

Parents, ever attended a Parent- School conference and

Ø  left clueless; you were unclear or did not understand what had taken place

Ø   too many issues were covered as well as those you thought previously resolved

Ø  you did not remember what actions were to follow the conference

Ø  You felt inadequately prepared

I will offer three tips to assist you with Parent-School Conferences; they have been taken from Parents Taking Charge in Education Series: How to Hold a School Conference? Written by Mrs. Dorothy Barron to share with you on today:

Ø  INTRODUCE YOURSELF

Ø  Introductions are important! Parent, introduce yourself and if, in a school conference for your child, give his/her name(s). Request the name of the individual(s) you are conferencing with if they do not introduce themselves. Have you ever been in a conference only to discover you were talking to the wrong person or the individual(s) had mistaken you for someone else’s parent? I repeat; introduce yourself! (Parents Taking Charge in Education Series: How to Hold a School Conference? Written by Mrs. Dorothy Barron)

Ø   ESTABLISH THE NATURE Of THE CONFERENCE

Ø  Obtain the reason(s) for the conference and issues to be discussed prior to the conference to allow you, the parent to prepare; if, not before, certainly at the beginning of the conference. Such avoids misunderstandings and assists with keeping the school conference on track (Parents Taking Charge in Education Series: How to Hold a School Conference? Written by Mrs. Dorothy Barron).

Ø  THE KEY IS SELF-CONTROL: ISSUES  v. EMOTIONS

Ø  Losing your temper or self-control often leads to little if anything being accomplished and issues and concerns at hand, forgotten ((Parents Taking Charge in Education Series: How to Hold a School Conference? Written by Mrs. Dorothy Barron).

Stay tuned; next week you will be provided with information about some specific tools that can assist Parents with becoming more informed, knowledgeable, and educated about the education process, which can enable you to better assist, become more confident, an informed decision maker and more involved in your children’s education and/or schools.

Mrs. Dorothy Barron, Author                                                                                                   

Parents Taking Charge in Education at http://mrsdbarron.blogspot.com                                       

E-mail: barron.dorothy@yahoo.com